under the blade
I flew into a panic and a rage when I found out that there had been “production problems” with the birth control I am on.
Like most of the women I know, I had a great deal of problems getting on to birth control (yes folks, that was about 15 years ago). I changed pills about 4 – 6 times before settling on Alesse. Unfortunately for me, this low dose pill is the only one that my body and brain could handle without complete malfunction.
In establishing myself on a pill I dealt with the following issues:
- weight gain of about 30 pounds.
- boob increase from a D to an E cup.
- extended ‘periods’ for the first 6 months. During most of that time I had some amount of bleeding or ‘spotting’ throughout the months.
- mood swings, confusion, anger, lethargy, soreness, achy-ness, crying, pain.
- diarrhea.
- cramps and very sore breasts,
A few weeks ago I go to the pharmacy to pick up my pills, only to find out that they *still* do not have any Alesse in stock. They suggest I make an appointment with my doctor and get a prescription for some kinda other pill.
I tell them that their suggestion is:
a/ not possible. I have no time or ability to get out to see my doctor and get a new prescription before the time at which I need to start my next cycle of pills.
b/ not a good idea. I have had major problems in getting my body and brain to adjust to the pills that I am on – and a change is bound to mean very negative things.
Too bad for me!
The pharmacy lady is huffy, but agrees to call my doctor and do the prescription change over the phone.
A couple days later I pick up my prescription for three months worth of Marvelon. Fuck.
Though the media reports out of Toronto suggest that 50% of the back-stocks of Alesse have been replenished, this is (at the time) not the case here in Vancouver. My only other option was to sit down with the phone book and call every pharmacy in the Lower Mainland and ask if they could *please* allow me to come and get some Alesse. Seeing that the *three* pharmacies that I normally deal with do not have any in stock, nor do they know when/ if they will get some – this task is too daunting for me.
I start taking the Marvelon.
Oh good lord.
The last two weeks have been a confusing blur of depression, hysterics, feelings of violence and absolute inability to control myself. I have been, a la Pulp Fiction, “pretty fucking far from okay.” There has been a lot of crying. Let’s just say that.
Now, I am not suggesting that Mavelon is an inferior medication to Alesse. My point is that birth control pills are a very specific thing and that yanking someone off a prescription that actually works for them is a bad idea.
‘Luckily’, last night when I went to my pharmacy, they had some Alesse back in stock. Despite the *excruciating* 20 minute wait until I could actually get some and take it home, I am thankful that I was able to go off the Marvelon as of last night.
I am hoping that over the next few days that my hormones readjust and that my brain and face no longer feel like there are going to explode with pressure/ anger. I am also hoping that I will stop feeling like I have to throw up every hour or two. It would be nice if I also didn’t feel like hiding under a blanket all the time. Those would all be good things.
If you haven’t seen me over the last couple of weeks, be thankful. It has been pretty ugly.
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