choke hold / strangle hold

Saturday, June 04, 2005

in a perfect world... all the geeks get the girls

you can bet that some of these words will be integrated into my vocabulary in the very near future....

clearly, foreploy is my favorite new word. read on:


The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.
Here are this year's winners:

1. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

2. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

3. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

4. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

5. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

6. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

7. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

8. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

9. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

10. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

11. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

12. Glibido: All talk and no action.

13. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

14. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

15. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

16. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

And the pick of the literature:
17. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

4 Comments:

At 11:40 PM, Blogger psychicle said...

Ang, in the splitsecond after I read "foreploy", I snorted so much, and with my mouth, that spit came out and dribbled onto my chin. I'm apparently not embarrassed to share that.

 
At 9:30 AM, Blogger goodurs said...

i really like these words. they're right up my alley. maybe i'll print them out and learn them. or maybe i'll try to come up with my own... although that might be a tad too nerdy for me. in any case, the wit is appreciated.

 
At 9:49 PM, Blogger choke_hold said...

psychicle -

snorting is never something to be embarassed by. it is *adorable*! (even with the spittle on your chin).

 
At 11:32 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

ha ha! forploy!

-david

 

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